Justin Bieber may just be the most insufferable celebrity in existence. Many famous people are undeserving of the negative attention that they receive, but not this insidious pop star; in fact, Bieber deserves every ounce of hatred that is sent in his direction. This incisive list demonstrates why the flamboyantly androgynous singer is downright despicable.
10. He Acts Entitled and Disrespectful
In social interactions, he is thoroughly uncouth; in fact, the twerp acts like he owns the world. The lazy brat always sends friends to do his bidding. With a personal army of cronies, he does not have to do anything by himself. He even strong-armed his way into the mixer’s both at a nightclub in Seoul, South Korea. Using his bodyguards for physical intimidation, he belittled the DJ and demanded hip-hop. Recently, the immature cretin even subjected the Great Wall of China to a series of pelvic thrusts, which have become a viral sensation on the internet, thus disgracing the legacy of the Ming dynasty once and for all.
9. He Lies About Drug Use
Just when cannabis was starting to acquire cultural legitimacy, Bieber got his hands on the ganja. Now, the former child star has been repeatedly spotted in possession of rolled marijuana joints. He apologized while hosting Saturday Night Live, and promised to cease the activity for the sake of his status as a role model. Unfortunately, this was just lip service, and the star was caught smoking soon after the televised event. This proves the grand depths of his insincerity, which illustrates a truly untrustworthy individual.
8. He Sings Like a Lady & Looks Like a Kid
Sure, a lot of male popstars have this problem, but none have yielded such extreme societal influence. His nasally voice is destroying mainstream music. He whines over cheaply reproduced R&B beats to set the tempo for a corrupted generation of radio listeners. These abysmal auditory creations have defined a decade. In the pompous words of Bieber himself, “I’m this generation’s Kurt Cobain!” This might just be a tragically undeniable fact. Endless impish immitators with high-pitch falsettos have sprouted up, and their hideous style has completely commandeered the airwaves.
7. His Family is Anti-Semetic
From the beginning, Bieber and his relatives have expressed blatant disdain for people of Jewish faith. His mother openly questioned letting her child be represented by a Jewish music agent at the start of his career. In a misguided attempt to make amends, the star wandered through the Anne Frank House while jovially shadow-boxing. He also disparaged her memory by saying he hoped she would have been a Belieber, which is supposedly an affectionate moniker he attributes to his mindless drones of obsessive prepubescent fangirls. Since she was being relentlessly persecuted by Nazis, Anne Frank probably would have had more important things on her mind than this little loser.
6. He Makes Miley Cyrus Cool by Comparison
In the last year alone (2012), Cyrus has accrued some serious street cred that makes her male counterpart look like a sheepish prude. While Bieber has been promoting “Believe 3D,” Cyrus has been pimping her new disc called “Bangerz.” While she hangs out with Snoop Dogg, Bieber continues to pander to a younger crowd. They released a collaboration together entitled “Twerk,” and it made the former Hannah Montana look blatantly punk rock in comparison with this glitzy weirdo.
5. He Brainwashes Little Girls
The ostentatious singer is disillusioning America’s daughters by instilling a false personal romance between him and his listeners. He routinely kisses his fans in front of cameras, and then leaves them to faint in a pool of tears. The “Heartbreaker” performer has cultivated unrealistic expectations of love for an entire generation of young ladies. Now, no one will ever be able to compete with the imaginary relationship they have with Bieber.
4. He Dated Selena Gomez
In essence, Bieber has defiled on of America’s most beloved performers with his wormy pestilence. The “Spring Breakers’ starlet is no longer plagued by Bieber, but their tenuous dating history has sparked jealousy from men around the planet. The vivacious Gomez was simply too stunning to have Bieber’s gangly arms wrapped around her. Now, she is free, but the real damage has already been done.
3. His Entourage Kills People
The man-boy is even putting you in danger, especially if you live in California. His leagues of minions are notorious for wrecklessly speeding through neighborhood streets in his vicinity. Lil Twist is an especially horrible homeboy. While rushing back to his boss in a decked out Ferrari, the sidekick ran over a photographer. The paparazzo did not survive his injuries; however, no remorse or pity was shown.
2. He is Insanely Rich
The pint-sized tycoon has amassed fortunes by manipulating the sensitive emotions of his youthful audience. The incessant bling demon is always flaunting extravagant gold chains and diamonds. Despite being raised by a single mother, he shows a total absence of humility. With only three studio albums, he has released endless chart-topping singles.
1. He is Everywhere
Bieber pretty much owns Youtube and Twitter, so there is no escaping this incorrigible bastard. On the former network, he earns approximately 20,000 new fans on a daily basis. Meanwhile, his Twitter handle has over 6 million followers. You cannot visit either of these sites without finding one of his videos lacing the front page. He travels the world with the insatiable thirst for attention, and he receives it wherever he goes.
Bonus: He Abused and Abandoned an Endangered Baby Monkey
German officials were forced to confiscate an endangered species from the eccentric entertainer while he was on tour. The primate was too young to have been taken from its mother in the first place. After this premature detachment, he attempted to smuggle the critter through international customs. Luckily, the monkey was given a home at a zoo in Germany, and the country continues to bill Bieber for caretaking expenses.
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